Proper Desire

Scripture Focus: Song of Songs 7.10-12
10 I belong to my beloved,
    and his desire is for me.
11 Come, my beloved, let us go to the countryside,
    let us spend the night in the villages.
12 Let us go early to the vineyards
    to see if the vines have budded,
if their blossoms have opened,
    and if the pomegranates are in bloom—
    there I will give you my love.

Reflection: Proper Desire
By Erin Newton

If we overheard this kind of mushy, lovey-dovey, colorful language, many of us would turn red. In this chapter, we are privy to the most intimate description of the woman. It is incredibly flattering; he loves everything about her.

In response, she suggests that they run off to a romantic getaway. Interjected into this proposal, she reaffirms their mutual commitment. 

Just like the previous chapter, she is for her lover. In this case, the second half of the line declares that her lover’s desire is for her. Is this sexual impulse, authoritarian rule, or something more?

Debate has occurred over the term “desire.” It is used only three times in the Old Testament. After the fall in Genesis 3, the woman is said to desire her husband. Sin desires to consume Cain due to jealousy. And finally, the lover desires the woman. The rarity of the word draws attention to its use.

In Genesis 3, the mutual relationship between the man and woman in Eden was suddenly disrupted. This fall from paradise produces “one of the most grievous ills of our world: the unequal power relation between woman and man that has been a feature of nearly every society from biblical times to the present” (Ellen Davis). Her desire after the Fall still entailed her longing for the man as it was in Eden but the new order was a distortion of their relationship.

When viewed in light of creation and the fall, it is desire which seeks to return people to proper communion. Aimee Byrd, in The Sexual Reformation, sees desire as the longing to restore the pre-Fall relationship between men and women.

In the Song of Songs, restoration between the man and woman is exemplified in the lovers’ relationship. She is fully committed to him. He longs for her in a way that echoes the woman’s desire in Genesis 3. Let us redirect our desire to restore unity that was lost in Genesis. 

In this picturesque view of intimacy, it is important to realize that despite the ideal nature of their relationship, the lovers can never satisfy their deepest longings. Aimee Byrd aptly warns, “Unlike the many resources marketed to Christians today, it isn’t found in so-called biblical manhood or womanhood. Unlike the many who oppose them, it isn’t found in egalitarianism…Joy is found in properly oriented desire.” And that desire is found in Christ, our Bridegroom. 

Divine Hours Prayer: The Refrain for the Morning Lessons
My eyes are upon the faithful in the land, that they may dwell with me. — Psalm 101.6

– From The Divine Hours: Prayers for Springtime by Phyllis Tickle.

Today’s Readings
Song of Songs 7Listen – 1:55)
Psalm 120-122(Listen -2:12)

Read more about Love is Not a Panacea
Why would we interpret sin on her part for being slow to rise and not sin on the man’s part for being absent in the first place?

Read more about Love Without Red Flags
“I am for my lover, and my lover is for me.” This literal translation reveals the self-giving attitude of the husband and of the wife. They are for one another.

https://theparkforum.org/843-acres/love-without-red-flags

Love without Red Flags

Scripture Focus: Song of Songs 6.3
I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine;
    he browses among the lilies.

Reflection: Love without Red Flags
By Erin Newton

…the lover’s pursuit continues. The friends ask (perhaps tongue-in-cheek) where her lover has gone. The woman replies that he has gone away but adds the comment: I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine. Maybe she was threatened by the interest of the friends. Or maybe it’s another praise of the fidelity of the lovers’ relationship.

What is she trying to say about their relationship? Is this a statement about dominance or authority? Is she simply warding off the possibility of seduction by laying claim to the man? If we understand this phrase as a sexual commitment of two lovers, 1 Corinthians 7.4 echoes this same sentiment. “A wife does not have the right over her own body, but her husband does. In the same way, a husband does not have the right over his own body, but his wife does.” (CSB translation)

Couples will likely give a hardy, “Amen,” to the suggestion of their spouse giving their bodies to one another in the context of sex. The guidance given to the Corinthians reveals the mutual equality of the relationship between these lovers. The idea moves beyond the concept of one person domineering the other; the husband and wife have the same instructions.

“The words express not clutching possessiveness but full belonging, one to the other,” Ellen Davis states. This is the ideal relationship. No red flags. No manipulation. This is the caring, selfless love of two people who seek the best for one another. It is easy to fulfill the desires of your spouse when that sense of mutual commitment and love is present.

This phrase which seems to summarize the essence of the ideal relationship is a four-word Hebrew phrase. You could translate it simply, “I am for my lover, and my lover is for me.” This literal translation reveals more of the self-giving attitude of the husband and the same self-giving attitude of the wife. They are for one another.

On Mount Sinai, God told the Israelites he would be their God and they would be his people (Leviticus 26.12). This relentless, fully committed love from God is our model.

A healthy relationship is a two-way street. The lovers share the same vision of respect, care, and desire for one another. In these statements, it can be hard to differentiate the words of the man and the words of the lover. Love is not self-seeking.

Divine Hours Prayer: The Greeting
Let all peoples know that you, whose Name is Yahweh, you alone are the Most High over all the earth. — Psalm 83.18


– From The Divine Hours: Prayers for Springtime by Phyllis Tickle.

Today’s Readings
Song of Songs 6Listen – 1:48)
Psalm 119:145-176 (Listen – 15:14)

Read more about Sexuality and Spirituality
True love seeks to move beyond the self-absorption that is common in our culture.

Read more about You’re The Top
Balancing humility and honesty while receiving compliments is complex. Neither self-inflated pride nor self-effacing despair are healthy.

Sexuality and Spirituality

Scripture Focus: Song of Songs 1.15-16
15 How beautiful you are, my darling!
    Oh, how beautiful!
    Your eyes are doves.
16 How handsome you are, my beloved!
    Oh, how charming!
    And our bed is verdant.

Reflection: Sexuality and Spirituality
By Erin Newton

No other book in the Bible has elicited more diverging interpretations than the Song of Solomon. Also referred to as the “Song of Songs,” the title means the greatest of all songs.

Most interpretations are either allegorical or literal. The allegorical interpretation views the poetry as a depiction of the love between God and his people. Each body part mentioned correlates to some spiritual or geographical meaning. Throughout the Bible, the relationship between God and his people utilizes the language of marriage (and adultery).

The literal interpretation views the poem as a dialogue between two human lovers (ex: Solomon and Pharaoh’s daughter). Some highlight the Ancient Near Eastern background connecting love songs to festivals.

Ellen Davis offers a complementary view into the Song which attempts to utilize both types of interpretation. “For a holistic understanding of our own humanity suggests that our religious capacity is linked with an awareness of our own sexuality.” This view balances the allegorical imagery of covenantal love with God and the marital love of two people. The Song should encourage us to apply holiness to our intimate sexual relationships. The Song also encourages us to keep our intimate spiritual relationship with God unadulterated. 

It can be difficult in our culture to imagine God’s love for his people as equivalent to the intimacy of lovers. We can barely talk about basic bodily functions without raising a warning flag that such content could be explicit. Likewise, our sexuality has become so taboo we have divorced the concept from our spirituality.

Our culture struggles with defining love. Ideas revolve around physical pleasure and reciprocal benefits. Love in our day is rarely long-lasting. Love is often self-centered and operates on a quid pro quo scenario.

Yet this poem opens with each lover praising the other. The attention of the lover is not to gratify the hormonal urge of the moment but to see each other in the fullness of one’s worth. You, as you are, are worthy of love. Love begins with praise.

In this way, Ellen Davis says that true love seeks to move beyond the self-absorption that is common in our culture. This same movement away from self and toward adoration of another is one that we ought to seek in our relationship with God. Selfless fascination with someone is only a small glimpse of the praise and adoration due to a far more worthy God.

Additional Reading: For more on Ellen Davis’s reading check out this article from The Bible Project

Divine Hours Prayer: The Call to Prayer
Know this; The Lord himself is God; he himself has made us, and we are his; we are his people and the sheep of his pasture. — Psalm 100.2

– From The Divine Hours: Prayers for Springtime by Phyllis Tickle.

Today’s Readings
Song of Songs 1 (Listen – 2:16)
Psalm 119:25-48 (Listen – 15:14)

This Weekend’s Readings
Song of Songs 2 (Listen – 2:15), Psalm 119:49-72 (Listen – 15:14)
Song of Songs 3 (Listen – 1:48), Psalm 119:73-96 (Listen – 15:14)

Read more about Setting a New Standard
No matter what culture’s moving needle says is moral, what matters to Jesus is God’s design.

Read more about Beyond Consent
When the only sexual ethic that exists is “consent” a lot of evil, manipulation, deception, and abuse gets a free pass.


Here Comes the Sun

Scripture Focus: Ecclesiastes 11.7-8
7 Light is sweet,
    and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.
8 However many years anyone may live,
    let them enjoy them all.
But let them remember the days of darkness,
    for there will be many.
    Everything to come is meaningless.

Reflection: Here Comes the Sun
By Erin Newton

Where I live, spring is emerging from the short, cold days and the long, colder nights. Despite my love of autumn, it is the warmth of spring that seems to break through a life stifled from winter. Like the Teacher says, “Light is sweet, and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.” 

The light of the sun is often used to express a sense of blessing or pleasure. Good days are typically described as bright days, warm days. The priestly blessing calls for God to shine his face upon the people (Numbers 6.25). The psalms equate righteousness and justice with light; “He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun” (Psalm 37.6). 

The Teacher uses this observation of light to encourage others to enjoy life when possible. Standing in contrast to the joy of light is the memory of darkness. We have walked through the Psalms, Proverbs, and Job. We acknowledge the reality of suffering, oppression, pain, and trauma. Wisdom teaches us to balance the enjoyment of good days with the suffering in trials. 

During the Medieval period, some embraced a lifestyle of asceticism within the restrained lifestyles of monasteries and convents. Even today, some view the Christian life as a somber pursuit constantly at war with everything. We become hyper-focused on the denial of our flesh and forget that the world was created for enjoyment. 

With the rise of mental health issues, it is imperative that we learn the wisdom of Ecclesiastes. The Teacher rightly points away from ultimate fulfillment in any pursuit apart from a relationship with God. And amid saying everything is meaningless, there is this silver lining: We must hold together the pain of the dark days with the joy of the lighter moments. 

We enjoy the spring warmth more because of the coldness of winter. We celebrate each victory of justice compared to the moral failures of a society sick with injustice. We do not whitewash the pain of history by forgetting the dark days. We remember them. The remembrance of those days is what brings the joy of light. 

If the Lord allows us to enjoy a moment, accept the gift. We do not need to feel guilty, so long as we are honest about the sufferings in the past and recognize the potential for suffering in the future. Wisdom balances pain and joy.

Divine Hours Prayer: The Small Verse
The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light; on those who live in a land of deep shadow a light has shone. — Isaiah 9.1

– From The Divine Hours: Prayers for Springtime by Phyllis Tickle.

Today’s Readings
Ecclesiastes 11 (Listen – 1:40)
Psalm 117-118 (Listen – 2:52)

Read more about What Time is It?
The teacher’s poem about time and seasons, however, might be the most well-known biblical poem in our culture.

Read more about Existential Dread
It can be tempting to hide our emotions even in our prayers. However, pain needs to be voiced.

Existential Dread

Scripture Focus: Ecclesiastes 4.2-3
2 And I declared that the dead,
    who had already died,
are happier than the living,
    who are still alive.
3 But better than both
    is the one who has never been born,
who has not seen the evil
    that is done under the sun.

Reflection: Existential Dread
By Erin Newton

Something I have learned in counseling was the advice to let people express themselves without correction. Suffering leads us to heavy emotions with thoughts that are far from optimistic. The Teacher in Ecclesiastes sees suffering and declares that it is better for those who are not alive. This response feels out of place in a faith which declares the preciousness of life.
Ecclesiastes reveals the temporal nature of pleasure, possessions, wisdom, and life itself. Everything is futile. The mature Teacher is attempting to help others navigate the transitory nature of human existence. In the face of oppression without comfort, the truth is that only the dead avoid such pain.

Is it wrong to look at life this way? Is the Teacher promoting hopeless, meaningless existence? In the following chapters, the Teacher will point back toward enjoying life centered on God.

Our faith in God does not remove these moments of existential dread. Sometimes we feel the need to put on an air of optimism in bad circumstances. It can be tempting to hide our emotions even in our prayers. However, pain needs to be voiced. Understanding that pain exists in the world of the living is not an unfaithful observation.

The Bible gives us examples of people who have faced this type of despair. Elijah felt the pain of suffering without comfort. He sat under a tree and hoped he could die (1 Kings 19). But God was not finished with the prophet. Similar to what the prophet learned, the book of Ecclesiastes does not end with a defeatist attitude. Wisdom leads us to God.

Through Paul’s words, we see the release from suffering through death but also the value of fulfilling God’s purpose through living.

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith… (Philippians 1.21-25)

Existential dread is answered in a life with God. 

Divine Hours Prayer: The Call to Prayer
Let us make a vow to the Lord our God and keep it; let all around him bring gifts to him who is worthy to be feared. — Psalm 76.11 

– From The Divine Hours: Prayers for Springtime by Phyllis Tickle.

Today’s Readings
Ecclesiastes 4 (Listen – 2:18) 
Psalm 106 (Listen – 4:52)

Read more about What to Expect When Suffering
When in suffering, we can at times be surprised by the emotions that are stirred. We can encounter deep sadness, anguish, and even rage.

Read more about Helping Fathers and the Fatherless
May we…introduce…a definition and example of fatherhood that is based on the love that God has shown us.